For Realz

Anyone who knows me knows I obviously did not make my 40 by 40 list. Things being what they are, life intervened. To be honest, that 40 by 40 "challenge" really seems self-centered to me as I look back on it. It may not be, but to me--since everything I do is so embedded in my family life--listing things that I want for me that are so exorbitant is, well, selfish. Even my time spent away from tasks, people, is exorbitant at times.

So, here is a more realistic list of things that I want to do by the time I'm 45. 45 sounds good, right? Truthfully, I picked the age arbitrarily. These things are real goals of mine and I make this list because it is doable, difficult, and I'll be proud of myself for accomplishing them. Some are like resolutions and most are not bizarre and "out there" things, but so what:

1. Get back in my goal weight range. Dr. J would like me in the 120's. I'm in the 130's now, but keeping yourself inside your goal weight range is easier on your joints.

2. Start walking for exercise. The running was fun, but the knees they built me 20 years ago definitely do not like the running.

3. Hike the entire Lone Star trail. I've wanted to do this for years. I believe this was on my 40 by 40 list. It's still a good goal and lots of fun. So why not?

4. Take the kayak out on the lake regularly. This requires me to be able to turn it upside down and put it over the truck. It's inflatable and unwieldy, so I need to get the hang of that so I can do that myself. Not to mention how susceptible it is to wind. Talk about a spongy ride. But fun!

5. Get certified in secondary 8-12 science, then secondary 8-12 mathematics. I'm definitely working at something that isn't what my target when I was in college, but considering the family issues and the major employers in town, Teaching here is a good fit. And I really enjoy teaching and meeting the kids.

6. Finish all the unfinished remodeling jobs in the house. This includes light fixtures instead of dangling light bulbs.

7. Write that stupid book that's been nagging me for so long. I've started it and am working on it, but need to make some hard decisions about characters and where to start.

8. Work with Squib to develop some of his art skills. He goes to "art" at school, but it's nothing like what he's truly ready for. He's already building sculpture and only lacking technique.

9. Write more. This is separate from the book. I'd like to blog more. I'd like my journal to be more consistent. I'm in an unusual situation where I can record four generations of our family and I want to record it for later generations.

10. Learn more. I'm 41. Buddy is 64. We're the two that "do stuff" and he does a lot of things that I don't know how to do. Not because I can't. It's because I haven't ever done it. So, I need to tag along and make sure I can do the things he does with various stuff around the property in case he can't do it. It's not morbid. When you live together like this, it's just what you do.

11. Have more lunch and dinner parties. Life is short. You should share life with everyone you can.

12. Sing more. Think less.

13. Get rid of all the things I don't need or haven't touched for the last six years.

14. Listen to more music.

15. Get into a regular routine so that I feel better.

16. Encourage, support, enjoy, and be in awe of my boys more.

17. Talk to my grandmother more. She's a saint and there's so much she's been through so much. Someone should carry the family history.

18. Teach my children to enjoy the outdoors. They've been inside so much due to medical issues, but that's not an issue now. It's time to explore! It's time to slide on our butts down into the gully!!

19. Get comfortable being me. As is. And for crying out loud--pitch the make up!!!!

20. Keep an even keel and laugh as often as possible.



So there. My 20 by 45. More realistic and refreshing. I can do this!
Scat