Some things speak for themselves. Tonight, Squib absolutely could not go to sleep until I had taken dictation of this note. He did not finish his late snack of peanuts and, fearing that these were the last peanuts on the face of the earth, he wanted to make sure no one ate them or threw them out. This is a legitimate concern in this household for any object--even if you put it where it belongs in your very own room. So, perhaps his fears are well-founded. These are his words. I tried as hard as I could to copy them down with a straight face.
When he solemnly peaked out from the bed covers and suggested that we include this note in our prayers so that it would really work, I lost it. Weeping, I prayed for his nuts because that's what good, faithful moms do. When he asked, "What's so funny about my nuts?" I had to leave the room.
Nay, the house.